Which is More Private: Sex, Religion or Money?

I would suggest for most of us we keep our money lives more private than either sex or religion. We also keep our sex lives private, of course and our religious understanding is shared mostly with family and fellow travelers. But our money lives we keep secret, not only among friends but often even from our kids and  our spouses.

Curious, this.

I probably would just as soon not know too much about other people’s sex lives, though I do have the curious voyeur in me, as I assume most other folks do, at least a bit.  We keep our sex lives private for a reason, and pretty good reason. Our private sexuality is part of the beauty of being human, part of the intimacy involved. Like an orchid exposed to too much sun will wilt in such abundance, so too our sexuality, with too much exposure, loses some of its delicious mystery, beauty and power.

Relative to religion, some folks emphasize the verse which says, “If you are embarrassed (ashamed) aof me, so too on the day of judgment will I be embarrassed of you,” or some such.  So they wear their religion on their  sleeve, telling everybody within preaching distance just how things should be. Could be, openly claiming a certain religious status. So be it. Everybody has their way, and season for such religious exhibitionism. As with sexuality exhibitionism, it’s a way of connecting with others—a particularly narrow way, in my view, but nevertheless a way.

My own sense is that those who wear their religion on their sleeve don’t yet have it in their underwear. But that’s just my person sense of things. (I believe everybody has religion in their heart, if they would just look for it there. )

When it comes to money, it seems that most of us—if not all of us—are very resistant to talk about it, unless we are trying to inflate ourselves and our status. Most of us are reluctant to talk about money because we are insecure—or at least unsure—about where exactly we fit in, and how others might think of us and our personal money use and abuse.

For some of us—more than might be expected—we are a little embarrassed by our “embarrassment of riches.” We are embarrassed by  how well-off we are.

Others of us, of course, are embarrassed by how close we are to bankruptcy, or homelessness.

Most of us are somewhere in-between, and have only a vague notion where, on the “Bankruptcy to Riches” scale our friends, family and strangers we deal with every day might fit in. So we keep our money lives private. So be it.

Nevertheless, it would seem both useful and healthy if we could be more open about our money matters—our money in and money out balance, or lack thereof.

I’ve come to understand and accept that we are social critters—like the honeybee, the ant, the wolf. Of course, we each have the “lone wolf” gene – be it dominant or suppressed. But un general, we all want to roam with the pack, move with our class from  4th to 5th grade, from social studies to recess, from winter camping grounds to summer grazing grounds. We’re tribal. We’re part of the flock. This “private, private, private” money mindset feels a bit constricted, even unnatural.

I feel fortunate to have spent seven years or so as s stockbroker, so I learned to go beyond my comfort levels and talk openly, if quietly, about money matters with lots of different people at many different levels of the money scale. And I also find money to be a fascinating “energy,” and conundrum, in spiritual circles. I’ve made a study of it over the past many decades.

So this is first in a series, talking openly about personal money matters. Pardon me if it feels a little bit like talking about the weather with my zipper down.

Why are we shy, or embarrassed or reluctant to talk about our money lives? Our money concerns? Our money ignorance and vulnerabilities?  I think these are questions worth exploring.

So, for just one easy payment of $2,500.00, you can join me in this exploration.

Of better yet, for free, if you want to sign up here…  .

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